10 red flags and other dating secrets

10 red flags and other dating secrets

If a guy is really interested in starting (or continuing) a real relationship with you, you will be on his mind, and he won’t forget to call.

I know there are lots of reasons people can run late that are beyond their control (traffic jam, car problems, being stuck at the office), but a quick call from his cell phone will put your mind at ease, and let you know that you have a few more minutes to try on that one other outfit you were still considering.

There's the outside chance that he’s embarrassed by his family.

I have a good friend whose husband’s family (which consists of his elderly mother and Aunt, who raised him together and still both live together) are essentially, well, mildly deranged.

When I look back at all the relationships that didn't work out (that I so wanted to at the time), I realize that in every case, there were early warning signs that my guy gave me that could have given me some idea of the heartbreak I was going to experience if I had only been aware of what to look for. Granted, I know that sometimes life can get it the way, and if he’s working late on that big project with the looming deadline it’s possible that time might get away from him once in a while.

So, to spare you from what happened to me, to give you the inside scoop on what can be on the lookout for, here’s my list of the warning signs that I didn't heed. But if this happens more than once or twice, it’s a sure sign that you’re just not a priority for him right now.

Cell phone reception is excellent these days (unless he’s a lumberjack working in the Great North Woods), so this one is unforgivable.I’m all for living in the moment and enjoying the “now”.But eventually in a relationship a discussion of future plans has got to come up – otherwise you’ll never know if the two of you are sailing together or heading towards different continents.If he’s just taking off on a surf vacation to Bali with his buddies over the holidays because that’s when it’s less crowded, and you’re not invited, then you’re clearly a low priority to him.In my experience, “platonic” friendships are rarely, if ever, that – there are almost always some feelings in one direction or the other.

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But if he’s still reminiscing about his single life escapades after your relationship has moved to the next level, or worse, making plans to have more of those escapades (without you), then the truth is he still wants to be single. Your best bet is to walk away gracefully, with your self-esteem intact, and not look back.

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Comments:

  1. 1
    Steve

    Message members in your destination city ahead of time to mix business with pleasure. We count down the hours instead of enjoy our time and we long for something more, but in the end we are left with the mundane, boring, everyday activities that make up our lives. A fleeting glance, an accidental touch, a returned smile: these moments show us a glimpse of something different, something more.

  2. 1
    Steve

    I prescribe medications along with providing individual and family therapy in my private practice in the Towson, Maryland area.""I specialize in adolescents and adults dealing with the gamut of mental health issues, from substance abuse, schizophrenia, Bi-polar, trauma, anxiety, ADHD, depression, to situational factors arising as part of the human condition.

  3. 1
    Steve

    It might sound obvious, but when you really allow yourself to listen—and ask questions about—what your partner says, it not only leads to better conversations, but also better communication. Have a weekend getaway with your friends every few months.

  4. 1
    Steve

    Things are new and you aren't familiar with what the other likes yet. Opt for something that gives you both an easy out, like lunch or a drink.

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